My Favourite Jokes!

As everyone who’s friends with me knows all too well, I’m a complete pun-enthusiast and always try my best to come up with a new one in any given situation. Thus, here are some of my best creations: 

What’s brown, tastes good on bread and designs fashion? Donutella Versace

What do you call a very handsome manager? Exe-cute-ive!

What does an ambitious Scandinavian say to his rival at a competition? ‘There’s Norway I’m letting you beat me!’

Why did Piglet look into the toilet? Because he was searching for Pooh

What do you call a vet who specialises in canines? A dogtor

What do you call it when a gay person takes over the planet? Conqueering the world

Why do vegans not like romantic movies? Because they’re too cheesy

What did the briefcase say when the purse asked it how it was doing? ‘I’m feeling sbagtecular!’

This guy from the Rolling Stones keeps making fun of everyone, it seems like he really enjoys taking the mickey.

What is Shrek responsible for when throwing a party with his friends? The ogrenisation

What did Stevie Nicks say when she logged into Mick Fleetwood’s computer without his permission? ‘Fleetwood Hack!’

What do you call it when a specific Asian country becomes a sovereign state? Indiapendence

I don’t get why some people take their cuppa without any milk or sugar, that must taste so teadious.

What do you call an angel that makes you feel better? A cheerub

Which is the most idiotic stylistic device? Oxy-moron

What do you call a furry animal that takes selfies with an app and sends them to people? A Snapcat


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